I’m so lost

[katerinachk]

I’m at a total loss right now. My 10 year old lab mix was in the backyard on December 31st running around with her tail up, galloping, barking at people walking by… it was a normal thing for her to do. Earlier that morning she snuggled up to me in bed and then I got out of the shower she came and sat next to me, all normal. 9:15 AM she is having her normal backyard behavior as mentioned above and at 9:45 my wife and I find her laying in her dog run, passed away. She was laying on her side next to the AC units, eyes open, tongue out, gone for likely 20 minutes or so.

She was one of my best friends, I truly loved her. We rescued her as a puppy, she was found tied to a tee with cigarette burns all over her and despite that she was the sweetest most playful girl. I am happy we were able to give her a good life but now I’m lost… she seemed fine and I looked at the cameras, she went from playing to gone in a blink and I have no answers.

I’m so lost without my baby girl right now and I can’t stop thinking about the most loving dog in the world who ALWAYS wanted to be around us, dying alone outside.

How do I cope with this? I won’t ever have answers to the cause as she has gone for cremation.

 

[modestshadow]

@katerinachk Im so sorry you lost your good doggo this way. She knew she was loved and what a lucky girl to be rescued by such loving family. Hopefully when you are ready she will send you a new one to love

 

[fibble]

@katerinachk So sorry for your loss. Please don't beat yourself up. A family member years ago had a similar situation, dog was fine running around, was in her outside area at her usual time and later found on her side passed. She had bloat. Not fully detectable and requires immediate vet attention. I think in solace, embrace the fact that you provided your dog with a loving home and certainly a contrast to her previous conditions. For what time she, or for whatever dog as their time is short compared to ours, you gave your dog the best. I have saved this story for myself when it's time for my dog to hopefully get me thru the sadness when it's her time. I hope it helps you... https://www.goodthingsguy.com/opinion/why-dogs-live-shorter-lives/#:~:text=The%20little%20boy%20seemed%20to,%2C%20%E2%80%9CI%20know%20why.%E2%80%9D

 

[verasoldmine]

@fibble That link actually made me cry at my lunch in work. Thank you for posting such a touching post. My two boys are 12 and 13 and I am so aware of this now. I know there will come a time in the coming months or years (I hope it’s years) that I will need to deal with their loss and this link made me realise how right that little boy was. If we all loved and were as loyal as dogs were the world would be a nicer place.

 

[chole1]

@katerinachk I’m so sorry for your loss. We had something similar happen to ours about 4 years ago. He was running outside like usual, came inside, had a sudden heart attack and fell over. There was nothing we could do for him. Take it one day at a time, I’m sorry OP

 

[primsroses]

@katerinachk Rainbow bridge
It came to me that every time I lose a dog they take a piece of my heart with them, and every new dog who comes into my life gifts me with a piece of their heart. If I live long enough all the components of my heart will be dog, and I will become as generous and loving as they are.

I've been through this many times and my heart breaks for you, but we're always better off for having them in our lives while we can.

 

[john919]

@katerinachk It is possible that she just had a massive heart attack or stroke if she went from playing to nothing very quickly. She possibly went from playing, to feeling a bit tired and deciding to go to the run and have a nap, to nothing. This is quite possibly the best way for a dog to go. One minute they're having fun the next they take a nap and it's no stress to them.

You gave your dog a wonderful life and it sounds like she went out of her life having a good time. To her it was a normal fun day. The tongue out is pretty normal, as the body relaxes the tongue muscles relax and it just flops out.

 

[gma_93]

@katerinachk I lost my last girl in rapid fashion as well. She was a happy healthy 10.8 years old. She had just recovered from ACL/CCL surgery and we were ready to go one more adventures in her last few years.

Sadly she was not acting normal on a Wednesday. Thursday she seemed just fine. She declined rapidly Friday and I had to put her down.

The Emergency Vet did a quick scan and she had several masses in her abdomen. She had no blood pressure and her gums were blue with no blood.

We realized she had several masses of hemangiosarcoma that ruptured and she bled out internally.

She went in peace just like your girl did. It will get better with time. Hang in there.

 

[durph08]

@katerinachk What a horrible, heartbreaking thing and I am so so sorry for your loss. It sounds like it happened suddenly, from a cause that wasn’t visible. She was loved for every second and knew nothing else-it doesn’t sound like she suffered. Hugs to you.

 

[rjtiller]

@katerinachk I am so sorry for your loss. We are going through the same thing. Our 13 year old Sheltie was perfectly fine, clean bill of health 2 months ago. I went to work, my husband went in the shower and when he came downstairs he found her laying in vomit and feces, barely alive. Called me and rushed her to the vet where she died. We think she had a mass that ruptured and she bled to death.

I am sorry I have no suggestions for you other than I know exactly what you are going through. Please take solace in knowing you gave her an amazing life as she also gave you. You were blessed to have her in your life. That is what I keep trying to tell myself.

 

[spinuscyn]

@rjtiller That’s awful, I’m so sorry you had to see that happen. I don’t understand why life has to be so horrible some times. Very sorry for the loss of your best friend.

 

[rjtiller]

@spinuscyn Thank you very much. I feel bad for my husband who had to find her in that condition and rush her to the vet. And witness everything at the vet. I was able to get to the vet shortly before she passed.

 

[mayfrancis]

@katerinachk I’m really sorry to hear about your loss. At least she was able to pass while doing something she loved and made her happy. That is a small mercy that both you and her were spared having to put her down in a vets office where’s she would’ve been uncomfortable. And from the sounds of it, you gave her the best life she could’ve ever wanted.

 

[rameshpothala]

@katerinachk I’ve been there. The pain from the loss can seem unbearable. Every room holds a memory, and every memory brings the tears. It’s been 3 yrs since we lost our Golden Retriever, Chester, and the sorrow is still there. But it does get better with time. I can look at photos again without crying, but it still hurts, just duller. So let yourself grieve. Give yourself permission to cry, and you WILL cry often. The tears will eventually come less often. Allowing yourself to grieve gives value to what she meant to you. Let her know that she was priceless.

 

[macpella]

@katerinachk I’m so sorry

 

[darpharm]

@katerinachk So sorry for your loss xx

 

[ashdorkable]

@katerinachk I'm sorry.

 

[easyrider2]

@katerinachk I'm sorry for your loss.

 

[strongmom]

@katerinachk So sorry for you loss friend! My childhood dog passed in a very similar way. Running around the house one minute and the next she had a seizure and died right there on our kitchen floor. She was 8 and had no prior issues that we knew of. Hope you can take a little comfort in knowing that she lived her best life with you

 

[beautyusa]

@katerinachk I'm so sorry for your loss! it truly is sooo hard to lose a dog(a child to most owners). end of last year our 2 year old pup started not acting herself and then had breathing problems. we had no answers until the vets did an autopsy. it ended up being bone cancer in her lungs. its still so hard being without my baby girl and its really just about taking it hour by hour and remembering all the good memories and the wonderful things you did for her. giving out love and putting smiles on other's faces can be healing especially if that was something your dog did. i know my girl loved greeting everyone she met and made them feel so special so i try to always be extra kind and patient to everyone