[Rant] I’m so sick of non-dog owners “educating” me about how I need to show my dog I’m the alpha and be domineering

[refei]

@kaccy He actually bragged that he wasn’t trained. Oh well, can’t help some people. Try to move on. My dog doesn’t care what they think and neither do I.

 

[je5usfre4k]

@kaccy Cesar Milan’s stupid-ass television show did so much damned damage to dog ownership it’s unbelievable. He should be ashamed of his crap.

I get it, I really do. I’ve owned two reactive dogs for the last fifteen years and it’s a PITA when people with easy dogs are so fucking smug and sure they know it all. They don’t and they will never get it and all you can do is think, “your turn may come, pal. Enjoy.”

I’m so sorry.

 

[kaccy]

@je5usfre4k Thanks for this, it really helps having support! Yea, every time I hear someone bring up Cesar Milan I’m like oh boy here we go… lol I’ll be honest, I’m jealous of ppl who have easy going friendly dogs, but it doesn’t take away how awesome my dog is 98% of the time I do hate the smug ones that don’t give a crap when they see my dog flipping out & they still come at us full speed bc it’s not their problem. This one lady bugs me so much bc she speed walks w her dog & she will straight come up on us SO FAST w no warning!! Once I was picking up after my dog when she pulled that crap and I seriously almost ate sh*T bc my dog freaked thinking we were being attacked! Hell, it took me by surprise too and this lady just gave me that smug cocky look like ugh pathetic, control your dog. I wanted to fling poop at her but I also gotta give credit to some neighbors who see me and give me a nod like they understand and they either wait to give me time to turn my dog away or they go out of their way to take a different route! I just wish ppl would stop telling me what my relationship w my dog is and what my dog is thinking SMH. Thanks for letting me rant!

 

[leozw]

@kaccy Has nothing to do with being an alpha or dominating your dog. Its about having the energy of a leader and sending that to your dog. Can quite literally whisper and accomplish far more than yelling. Its about attitude, calmness, neutrality, strength. I speak through the tools I use. There is very rare occasion where yelling will help with anything. It adds stress, increases anxiety and jacks up the energy of the situation.

Dogs absolutely need a leader. That is just a fact of nature. It is built into their behavior. Without one, they feel like they need to be in charge. And thats when bad things happen, because dogs dont make good decisions. I would say one of the biggest problems that a lot of people have on this subreddit is their pack structure is backwards. The dog is feeling the need take responsibility. Which makes them more stressed out, more reactive, more afraid.

 

[jfgcoffee]

@leozw That's just the thing. To a lot of people "alpha" means something different than what the word is supposed to mean in scientific research. Yes, wolfpacks have an Alpha-couple, which lead their pack. But the way they communicate has nothing to do with aggresion. The language they use is much more subtle. If only more humans would understand this, communicating something to a dog does not require yelling, yanking a leash or worse. It's very subtle bodylanguage in every moment you spend with a dog. We could have far less idiocy concerning dogs if people would educate themselves.

 

[txlove]

@jfgcoffee We generally call "alpha couples" parents.

 

[kaccy]

@txlove This is seriously the PERFECT response!! it’s just spot on! Thanks!!

 

[kaccy]

@jfgcoffee Yesssssss!!! I absolutely agree w you on this!! Being a good leader has nothing to do w overpowering or being aggressive/threatening in my opinion. I’m firm w my dog when I need to be but I’m never yelling/screaming at him, never yanking the crap out of his leash or hitting him. I think dogs know who is “boss” without all that towering fear placed on them; there’s no reason to break their trust/love by scaring them to prove a point that you CAN be scary. Thanks for your comment and letting me vent, I really appreciated your words

 

[kaccy]

@leozw I think dogs look to their owners as their leaders. At least I know mine does. He knows I decide when he eats, what he eats, when he gets to go on walks, when he gets play time, etc etc. He’ll let me know when he has to potty or if he wants to play but at least for me, my dynamic w my dog is great. He looks to me and constantly looking to only follow me. I don’t believe I give off poor energy that triggers my dog to feel like he needs to take charge. He walks by me, he waits for my commands, and he wants me to lead him… but that won’t change his fear of other dogs bc of his history no matter how much I try to show him it’s ok I can protect him and he is safe. I’m not 100% convinced that reactive dog owners stress their dogs out with subconscious body language like giving off stress energy. Maybe some do, but I know some don’t it’s just unfortunately their dogs are reactive and in their own zone when triggered. Again, just my opinion though.