Vent on rehoming

[johndoe590]

@hyojyang88 Just fixed! Thanks so much

 

[annie2011]

@johndoe590 I'm not born or raised Western (but now live in the US). Even though I absolutely adore my pup, OP's feelings with the name is fascinating to me. Here's how my brain goes: "The man intended for a companion animal, emphasis on animal. He has every right to call his dog whatever he wants to, and no one is harmed by using the same name for a dog. It's not as if new B will ever know that there was an old B, either. Proper nouns are things we humans arbitrarily ascribe value and meaning to."

Now I'm very curious, what aspect makes the part socially unacceptable? Is it because of a perceived lack of effort? Lack of creativity? Humanizing the dog? I think I need to learn since a lot of other (US-based?) commenters also think it's tactless.

 

[l123]

@johndoe590 I think he needs to stop taking in dogs and get a goldfish.

 

[mistigale]

@l123 Considering how many people don't understand how to adequately care for a goldfish... please no!

 

[misalis]

@l123 He’s probably complain and say it’s not active enough

 

[emmawitayim]

@johndoe590 He could have said “nippy” to be nice. He could have grand kids or other children he wanted to be around the home but became a liability.

I for one had to rehome a pup we had for 5 years. We introduced a kid and went through a training g specialist, positive reinforcement, but still would not remove himself from stressful situations. It’s no life having to live in fear. He ended up nipping our daughter as he walked by her. She did not initiate contact.

He, at that point, was dead to me. I loved him, but he is a dog. A pet. And as much as a part of the family he was, that simple act was enough. And I will make that decision again in a heart beat.

Now, we adopted a shelter pup at 6 weeks old about a year ago and she is absolutely amazing with our little one but our little is also taught how to behave around dogs. We aren’t parents that just let her climb all over the dog. I dont believe in that.

Any way, you do t know the reason behind it so don’t judge.

 

[katharina800]

@johndoe590 It’s hard not to judge sometimes but sometimes it really is for the best. My puppy is stranger and fear reactive and so far he’s only bonded and is willing to be left alone with me (a bit with my housemate, but only just, like he has to keep him busy or give him treats or he’ll start flipping out.) I don’t think he’d be able to succeed in a family home.

Obviously not willing to be cared for or handled by others is its own set of problems I’m working on, but I think he’d have been rehomed in a larger household, especially with kids. He’s just too predispositioned to fear/anxiety.

 

[edwardc]

@johndoe590 My dads family traditionally named all their dogs the same name one after another. They tell fond stories about the dog by it’s name but won’t specify which of the many dogs named that they’re talking about. I think that part can be chalked up to culture. I don’t have a ton to add other than that, except dog bites and “nips” that leave bruises hurt so much and are so scary that you may not know how you would react until it has happened to you - he may have felt capable of caring for the first dog until he suddenly completely couldn’t.

 

[hodgemorin]

@johndoe590 I also have mixed feeling about removing. When I first moved in and met my new neighbors, they said they had a Rhodesian Ridgeback before they moved in (just a month or two after we did). Because we don't have yards, they gave the dog to their mother because the dog lived being there and had a big yard to play in. Totally understandable amd respectable.

Then they came home last week with a Bernedoodle puppy. My feelings went from respect to disrespect very quickly. There may be things that I don't know about. I barely know them, they don't owe me their life story. But from what I do know, I'm disgusted. I genuinely hope I'm wrong because thats so horrible, in my opinion.

 

[aguayoscar]

@johndoe590 First of all, I find it interesting that you felt compelled to point out the neighbor’s age, apparent lack of children, and relationship status. All of these things are irrelevant to dog ownership and seem ageist and specifically judgemental, to say the least.

Secondly, unless you and the neighbor were close friends, I highly doubt that you have any idea what challenges the neighbor actually faced with the dog and it sounds like they tried hard to keep the dog by putting in six months of work. “Nippy” in a 1.5 year old dog could be code for a very serious problem that the neighbor was unable to fix, despite their best efforts. If anything, you should have some compassion for what was probably a very difficult decision for your neighbor. (Just because they seemed excited about the new dog doesn’t mean it was a tough choice to return the other one.)

Finally, the naming thing that seemed to send you completely off the rails about the neighbor is just petty. There is absolutely nothing wrong with giving two dogs the same name. It only matters to the person, not the dog.

Try walking in someone else’s shoes instead of having your opinions of people be “greatly changed” because of speculation and personal bias.

 

[johndoe590]

@aguayoscar Hi! I mentioned the age and family status because I think it’s important when considering a dogs behavior. I think there’s a lot less room for “training” a biting or nipping habit if there’s young kids at home, if that makes sense?

Again, as I mentioned in the post and comments my dog played with this dog frequently and the neighbor and I saw each other I’d say on a daily basis and he’d always offer up commentary on how well the dog was doing. That’s why I thought maybe he would have mentioned if things were going poorly that’s all.

Like I mentioned before maybe I was just sensitive to the name thing because it makes me feel like he thought the dog was interchangeable or disposable. As some other people have said it could be he just had an attachment to the name which is fine. It’s none of my business and I didn’t ask further than what he offered.

I feel bad that I have to reiterate different parts of my post, but it was clearly a vent and I even said I felt guilty for my initial reaction and thoughts on it. In multiple comments I agreed there was probably a lot more going on then I was aware of and I shouldn’t have been so quick to judge.

Anyways, he seems to be really happy with the new dog and the new dog seems happy so that’s really all that matters I guess.

 

[aguayoscar]

@johndoe590 I can understand your rationale regarding the age and family status but I feel it’s still irrelevant. As a single woman in my upper forties with no kids at home (they are grown and live elsewhere), I would not be able or choose to keep a dog who had certain behavioral issues either.

Venting is one thing but to me I felt that ultimately it was came across as very judgmental, however I’m glad that you can be happy that your neighbor was able to find a dog that hopefully is the right fit for them.