I hate when…

J

jimmykiff

New member
People and their dogs just stand in one spot and stare at you while your dog is reacting and you’re trying to get away. Like, GO AWAY. Or even worse, they try to follow you.

Had a surprise run-in with a person and 2 dogs coming out of their apartment (at 5:30am, which I thought was safe for us to be walking 😭). Mine started barking/pulling, so I tried to quickly get him down the street without looking back… was wondering why he was still barking (if he’s out of sight/sound, he almost immediately stops), I glance back and they had followed us for a little bit and stopped, and were STARING. I want to know wtf is going on through that person’s mind, that they think it’s appropriate to do that. If a child was crying in public, would you just stand there and stare at them? Obviously not.

There was another time a while back when someone came out w their dog right in front of us, my pup started reacting so I backed up the other way (away from going home), and the person just stands to one side of the sidewalk w their dog and gestures at me to come pass. This resulted in a very unsafe situation of me walking my dog into the busy main street (at least we have a bike lane) WHILE my dog is reacting and they’re just standing there staring at us.

Shouldn’t it be survival instinct for people to go AWAY from an animal that is barking/lunging/freaking out? I swear these are the same people who would get closer to a mama bear and her “adorable” cubs.

Edit: Adding a couple details for clarity. In both stories, they eventually went the other way. And the second guy was literally at the end of his own driveway. He saw me walk my dog into the street when they decided to stay, because if we had stayed on the sidewalk to pass them, there would’ve literally been no space between the dogs. Even though my guy is a frustrated greeter and does fine with dogs when he’s off leash, I didn’t wanna risk him getting into an actual fight with the other dog.

Edit 2: I’m really more annoyed at the lack of common sense, it’s not so much that I want them to care about what’s happening with my dog - I know that it’s on me to manage him. But if any person sees a 60-pound dog barking/lunging/growling at them, wouldn’t a natural reaction be, “oh that dog might be aggressive, I should go the other way” for safety reasons?
 
@jimmykiff Even better is when they stop and then start trying to talk to you. Not only am I really busy trying to help my dog get through something, but also, my ears can not hear anything from across a street when my dog is yelling frantically, thanks, talk later fella!
 
@alveno1blessed Oh my god yes. The old women are the worst for this. The other day I was walking on a trail and these two old women were about to pass us. My dog is generally fine walking by adults with no issues as long as we don’t stop, so I bring her to my right side (away from the two women) and walk by, and they both beeline towards her and start saying shit like ‘Ooh your mommy won’t let you say hi! She just wants to say hi!!’

Excuse me??? I couldn’t even think of a response before she lunged at them and they scurried away 🙄 Newsflash some dogs don’t give a shit about saying hi to everyone they meet and I am the owner and it is up to ME if I want my dog to interact with a stranger!
 
@lisamiller138 The way two random women acted in a single situation tells you NOTHING about how "old women" act in general. There are millions of women over age 40, and you interacted with two out of those millions (.00000000001%) . It's not logical to attribute their behavior to their age or gender. That's just stereotyping.
 
@jimmykiff I have found that if you speak with confidence, people will pretty much do whatever you ask. If someone is in my way, not moving, or not sure where to move, I simply say 'can you please move toward the fire hydrant, my dog needs space' and they generally do! Usually they are so shocked at a stranger bossing them around to argue. The trick is to be friendly, assertive and give a definite direction, like 'move to the left' or 'stand next to the fire hydrant'.

This takes practice! Spend a couple minutes practicing what you'll say our on walks, so your body knows how to do it when you're in full reactive dog owner panic mode.
 
@jimmykiff If they were going to walk that way down the street, then standing there was giving you time to move along. It would be nice for people to, but you can’t EXPECT people to not be in a public space because your dog can’t handle it. It’s on you to remove your dog. People who haven’t had a reactive dog don’t understand what you’re struggling with.
 
@douqqoo This 100% you can't expect people to just anticipate your needs. Those people were probably just going the same way as you and were trying to give you time to get your dog under control. It's not on the rest of society to accommodate for your reactive dog. If you want more space you have to use your words.
 
@skylar222 I've been walking in a direction before and someone turns out in front of us going the same direction, but just a bit ahead. If my dog is dead set on going that direction, we tend to just go in that direction but I'll slow him a bit if we get too close to the person ahead of us, especially if it is an area where it isn't safe to cross the street if we aren't at a crosswalk. I've had people try to yell at me for "following" them before, and usually just respond with something along the lines of "you walked out in front of us..." if they do.
 
@skylar222 They eventually went the other way - I should’ve mentioned that

Edit: and the second guy was literally at the end of his own driveway. He saw me walk my dog into the street when they decided to stay, because if we had stayed on the sidewalk to pass them, there would’ve literally been no space between the dogs. Even though my guy is a frustrated greeter and does fine with dogs when he’s off leash, I didn’t wanna risk him getting into an actual fight with the other dog.
 
@douqqoo Yeah whenever I see another dog coming, I immediately cross the street, go the other way, get the out of the situation etc. I wouldn’t expect someone else to?? It would be nice, but not really their problem.
 
@douqqoo This is true. They don’t understand. I also didn’t before I adopted my reactive dog. And it doesn’t mean that they wish something bad to happen, they just don’t know what’s going on. But I totally feel you. Yesterday morning I was walking my dog and another confronted us, wanting to pass by in a narrow street. My dog started reacting, I asked the other owner can they just wait a bit and I tried to get away my dog. The other owner waited 3 seconds and said to her friend “lets go, we also have treats!” and moved past us. Ofcourse, my dog started barking and went all crazy :(
 
@douqqoo This. It sounds like they were trying to give you space, but you can't expect everyone else to change their walking direction or route. Same with the person waiting in their driveway for you to pass. Their dog needs to pee and poop and sniff too, they shouldn't have to go back into their home until you've gone away completely. They were being polite by waiting and staying out of the way and telling you that you could have the space to move along.
 
@leathamoll There wasn’t space on the sidewalk for us to pass without the dogs being close enough to have direct contact, and he saw that I walked my dog into the (busy) street and didn’t move. I wouldn’t expect him to go back into his home, but at least go a little bit up the driveway to give us some space. I’ve also seen them enough that he knows which building we live in.
 
@douqqoo They weren’t going the same way, they eventually went the other way - I probably should’ve mentioned that

Edit: and the second guy was literally at the end of his own driveway. He saw me walk my dog into the street when they decided to stay, because if we had stayed on the sidewalk to pass them, there would’ve literally been no space between the dogs. Even though my guy is a frustrated greeter and does fine with dogs when he’s off leash, I didn’t wanna risk him getting into an actual fight with the other dog.
 
@jimmykiff I feel like “nice looking” or small reactive dogs have it harder. People want to infantilize reactive behavior and make the situation worse. When your dog is 85+ lbs and “aggressive” looking and sounding you definitely get more space. Once, a guy jumped into the bike lane out of fear when my dog barked… sigh…
 
@imagebeastmarkbeast A woman in my building started screaming and waving her hands frantically when the elevator door opened and she saw me with my (50 lbs, leashed) dog 😑 She always has her teensy 5 lb-looking dog off-leash which I’m honestly fine with but like, no need to scream and flail about, lady!!

Her dog wasn’t even worried about the situation until she wouldn’t shut up about it lol. Like, I get that you’re scared but read the room a little bit…. nothing is happening….

After the third time she reacted like that, I suggested a leash and she actually took my advice! So not everyone is unreasonable 👏🏼
 
@trinichristiannudist I wish the lady in my building with a tiny chihuahua had the same mentality as your neighbor! She supposedly used to own a dog training facility and always has her dog off leash… and tried to corner me and my pup once WITH HER DOG to give us unsolicited training advice. As my dog was losing it. 🤦🏻‍♀️
 
@jimmykiff So glad my dog is only reactive to German Shepherds 😅

Sometimes I wish I could jump high up on things (like a cat) so I could avoid people like your neighbor, who try to corner me with unwanted advice. See overly-chatty/kinda (definitely) racist neighbor? Jump into tree!

The flailing lady actually stopped bothering with the leash after a few times, after she got over what was clearly her own fear of my dog, lol.

When our dogs cross our paths now, they only sometimes bother acknowledging each other. I’ve actually never seen such apathy between dogs before.
 
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