Dog doesn’t trust/like me nearly 6 months in

[caughtup]

@unknown404 Your dog has c-ptsd. The shaking is a trauma release and it’s totally normal so let her shake. Clearly something happened where a male abused her.

Are you the one feeding her? That will help her trust you more. But you absolutely need to give her space. Don’t touch or approach her, let her come to you.

Put yourself in her shoes - if a man beat the shit out of you how would you feel around men? You’d be terrified, and that feeling doesn’t go away in 6 months. This is just an example since you don’t know what happened.

I would also work on your breathing. If you do things like box breathing you can calm your own nervous system and in turn calm her down just by being in the same room as her while doing it. It will reassure her.

 

[unknown404]

@caughtup I will feed her in mornings before I leave for work, but that is just me putting her bowl in front of her. She trusts my wife enough to let my wife feed her from her hand. She definitely doesn’t trust me enough for that yet. The only time I invade her space is to take her outside to go to the bathroom. Other than that I will typically let her be while trying to talk to her every once in a while so she knows I am acknowledging her and praising her.

As for the breathing, I am a calm person by nature and know that animals can sense heightened emotions from humans so I know I do a pretty good job of staying calm when I’m around or carrying her.

 

[caughtup]

@unknown404 Even if you’re calm all the time the box breathing will activate your parasympathetic nervous system and she will literally be able to feel that change.

Also, you feeding her the bowl every day over time will reinforce that she can trust you, so that’s good. Consistency is important.

And I would be sure to never approach her from behind where she can’t see you. As a person with c-ptsd this puts me in fight/flight instantly. Try to approach her from the side always.