corgi puppy update n.2

[limobustruckfleet]

Hi guys,

Apparently my 5 mo corgi puppy has been diagnosed with OCD definitely. We're reporting everything to the breeder. Our vet gave her one last week of toradol to see if it's pain that no screening has been able to detect, so yes, it's just one last desperate chance.
Otherwise, she suggested medication. We also bought CBD oil to see what's going on.

I literally can't. She gets worse everyday and immune to sound response. Just a high dose of toradol is barely doing something because she just sleeps, and she looks heavily drugged. Veterinarian said to give ourselves one month to see if giving her antidepressants work but every trainer we see says she can be rehabilitated within one year of work or so, and giving antidepressants alone doesn't work.
But I can't even go to the bathroom. She will straight up start chasing her tail for ages, they told us to make strong noises (they have, ofc to be random and then redirect her on something better but she stopped stopping to this and she just keeps going.
She started doing it outside and even at the park with dogs around. I can't drink one coffee in a bar because she'll straight up start barking.
Other corgi breeders heavily suggested returning her back.
One family has offered to take her if we can't do it. They already have one brother on dad's side with huge food allergies and I warned them that OCD isn't no joke nd they'll have to check on her 24/24, but they just act like it's one random trainer thing.
I said it's going to get worse as she grows up and the fact she's puppy looking and very cute when at the park doesn't mean anything.

Our breeder told us to send her back.

I just can't. I'm on the verge on a mental breakdown everyday and I can't seem to be doing any better. Everyone keeps saying "keep her", everyone says "return her to the breeder", I don't know what to do and I'm shattered.

 

[monk58]

@limobustruckfleet Hi

I hope this post comes across as constructive and this is a place where we do vent and let out all our stress and can really say what we feel

I have been following your posts and get an immense sense of stress: rightly so from you!

However you do seem to be adding everything up and jumping step after step ahead without really giving time to process and see. You actually don't have to make any decisions quickly (unless there are other things going on in your life)

The pup is very young. You now have a diagnosis and it is time to process and take step by step

I echo the post of chose your vet behaviourist (the most reliable for now) and is they work with a trainer, that trainer.

I assume they are going to start the meds

That is next step whatever you decide to do about ownership in the future

There needs to be a period of calm. A recognition that the behaviour though distressing is now diagnosed and will be treated but it is not a quick fix or solution

Only you and your partner can decide, calmly and with time whether or not you wish to procede but it is not this week or even this month. The dog is younga nd you are treating it

You have time to breathe

One thing I will say unless you are incredibly lucky with a pup even the most normal pup they do take two to two and a half pretty intensive years before you can really relax and have your coffee! That's the "normal" ones as well

I would step back form the issue and think really about yourself. Aside from the worry and stress are you and your family calm and can focus and keep perspective about this issue? Not be discouraged and although sometimes really wanting to gove up ultimately do think you can do it for your pup?

If not there is no shame at all in rehoming

Honestly! It will be for the best

However why back to breeder? From what you have said the breeder is not a good one.

What a re they going to do with the pup? Rehome to someone unexpecting? Dump in rescue? Or put down?!

If after a period of reflection you do decide to rehome, I wouldn't send back to breeder: no way!

I would contact a breed rescue (this is a pedigree pup) and very much work with them to find a true lover and understander of the breed who is in for the long haul

I do hope this post is at all helpful and I an sorry you are going through this

 

[moonblader]

@limobustruckfleet I’m so sorry this is happening to you. That sounds incredibly stressful. I don’t have much advice, but I will say that I’d recommend seeing a certified veterinary behaviorist (if you haven’t already) and ditching those trainers. Anyone who promises to “fix” something like that in a year is full of bull.

 

[tiernon]

@limobustruckfleet Ok, so I've never been exactly in this situation, but it's very similar to what I went through with my oldest (human) child. He was always a little peculiar, even as a toddler, but his odd behaviors never quite added up to a diagnosis. Now that he's in elementary school, he's pretty obviously on the Autism spectrum.

Do you know what everyone kept telling me for years? "Don't worry about it " "He'll outgrow that" "He's just a little quirky"

What everyone was trying to do was alleviate my worry and give me hope. Unfortunately, all they accomplished was making me feel dismissed, unheard, frustrated, etc. I wasn't worried about the diagnosis! I was worried about the behaviors! I wanted a firm diagnosis because then I would know what to do next!

But my family couldn't understand that. As far as they were concerned, my son already had a label: he was "normal." The possibility that he might be "autistic" threatened their understanding of him, so they assumed I felt threatened by that too. Hence trying to comfort me by telling me I was being paranoid.

Your family has a different understanding of your dog. They understand him conceptually. "He's just a dog doing dog things!" You understand your dog directly. You don't think about him in terms of how he's described, so changing how you describe him isn't that big of a deal.

What I'm trying to say is that people are really fucking terrible at comforting loved ones. Just ignore anyone trying to make you feel better if their attempts make you feel worse. Odds are high that they're speaking to their own worries and not yours. It's a pretty normal thing to do.

 

[relationshipwithgod]

@limobustruckfleet How are you taking care of your own mental health? Do you have a therapist you can talk to or close friends? You say “we” - how is your partner supporting you through this situation? Family and friends?

I know the dog is a hot mess, but it’s like the airline oxygen mask situation: you need to take care of yourself before you can take care of others.

Also OP, what do you love about this dog? What things do you enjoy doing with her?

(Edited - sorry I wrote my comment too quickly and realize it came off as too harsh). At some point I would start evaluating dog quality of life to see whether behavioral euthanisia should be an option (if in the worst case the meds do not help). If that is too painful to think about, stop reading about the option and think about it again in 2-3 months only if the treatments don’t seem to help. There are quizzes online you can look at for quality of life to gauge how much your dog is enjoying life now so you know 1) how severely this OCD is affecting her life 2) whether BE should be an option in the future. If your dog still has good quality of life that can be really comforting and keep you from catastrophizing too much. Take your time - there is no need to hurry through your options. It’s good that you are consulting so many people

 

[monk58]

@relationshipwithgod I do not think that starting to read about behavioural euthenasia at this stage will help this poster at all. They sound very overwhelmed and that is top level stress to go through without really very much time and information at all.

If the pup is 5 to 6 months it is barely enough time to know it at all let alone decide it is over IMO! I am really not sure most vets would agree to put the dog down at this stage

They are quite some way off this with such a recent diagnosis and young dog.

It is best sometimes not to look too far ahead in case we catastrophise. I agree the poster needs to seek help for themselves perhaps not focused at all on the dog

They do need to care for themselves though. Some of that is giving them self permission to not feel they have to fix this "now" and that they do have time for discussion and self care

 

[relationshipwithgod]

@monk58 I think for me I would be relieved to look at the quality of life scale and either think “Yes, my dog still has a good quality of life so BE is not on the table” or “Oh god their quality of life is horrible and vet agrees it will be in the future, maybe BE should be an option”, or “It’s in the gray area, BE not now but perhaps in the future”. The OPs statements that seem concerning to me about dog quality of life are the obsessive tail chasing.

I will strike some of my comments as I think they can read as too harsh.

I totally agree that it is too early right now to make the call since they haven’t tried medications.

 

[shawnmari]

@relationshipwithgod I can appreciate where your coming from as I also had an incredibly difficult puppy (now 1) who had similar issues although diagnosed differently by a vet behaviorist and I’ll say in terms of BE, it’s way way way too early! For us meds made a massive difference in our corgis ability to exist day to day as did the DVM’s training plans and the trainers plans. Now by no means does by corgi have a “normal” life but BE isn’t on the table anymore aside from some extreme circumstances we have discussed with our vet behaviorist.

I think a lot of people underestimate what meds can do.

Also I would not want to sound patronizing at all but some of what I think OP is dealing with is “normal” puppy behavior mixed in with OCD and if they want to wait it out (not saying they should) they will see that “normal” puppy behavior start to fall away (aka needing to constantly have things in their mouth, being unable to have a coffee in the morning peacefully, etc…). we couldn’t do those activities they mentioned either at 5 mo and the fact that our puppy has severe hyper arousal issues just made these “normal” behaviors exponentially worse. With meds they are mostly gone - he still has a ton of behavioral issues but I can make dinner/have coffee/chat with my husband for a few mins without worrying what is the dog doing!?!?!?!?!!!

Knowing what I know now I wouldn’t choose my dog again but I love him and we are working on it.

*sorry about typos! Wall of text on my phone .

 

[elizabeda777]

@limobustruckfleet On top of the good advice let me say this:

Take time to yourself.

This is stressful as hell and a long (lifelong for doggo) process. You can’t try multiple things at once and speed it up. Responsible trainers do not guarantee or estimate a behavior change, that’s a disservice to yo and your dog.

Take some deep breaths. Listen to some people here. Find a small way to get time alone and away from people and dogs. You can’t pour from an empty cup and burnout hits worse when you have a dog with behavioral problems.

Talk with your vet about ways you can help your dog while preserving your own mental health. You deserve to feel safe and well, too.