wordsfromwar
New member
Apologies in advance for the long post, but this is the only place full of people who understand..
I have a family member who’s a narcissist that loves to use being a doctor as an excuse for her entitlement. She buys people & things bc she cares a lot what others on the “outside” think of her. Yet her own family & “inner circle” are just puppets to her. If she can’t manipulate you, she cuts you out. So reasoning with her is simply never an option for me, or any family member.
She has a track record of buying puppies out of spontaneity, not training them, & then giving them away when she couldn’t handle them-complaining “they’re too crazy!” or “they won’t stop peeing & pooping everywhere!”
She bought her preteen daughter a puppy (let’s call him Fido) 8 years ago & I don’t know how he’s still alive. Her daughter grew up extremely spoiled & never once took care of him. Her father is the one who would feed him & take him out in a backyard thats about the size of a regular bathroom (idk, I’m bad with measurements). This 10 lb dog has also gotten into chocolate SO many times that I think he’s actually immune at this point. They just laugh every-time & it’s really a joke to them that he’s somehow still alive. Fido spends his days sleeping or barking at the door when the mailman comes by.
Her spoiled daughter then asked for a golden retriever, who lived with them for about 4 years before I thankfully convinced my cousin to re-home him, after seeing how miserable that poor dog was, & all the health/joint related issues he was developing.
Walking dogs? Just not a thing in that home.
About 2 years ago, she bought 2 new puppies (different litters & breeders). & Of course, she never trained either of them or socialized them. Much like the upbringing of her own children, she believes her only duty is to meet the basic needs (shelter, food, water, & clothing).
They are also 2 small 8 lb pups who have basically spent their lives confined to a crate & that small backyard. The crates don’t even have beds, blankets or toys, bc they destroy/eat everything from being locked up for up to 8hrs a day, every day. Since they were never housebroken or trained, they obviously pee/poop all over the house. So this family member really thought, instead of training dogs or giving them away, she just needs to keep them locked up.
The two pups get along, but since they’re both not neutered or trained, one dominates the other, & the family has had to intervene a couple times when fights got serious.
New bright idea: They decided to keep them both in the same crate, with a baby gate dividing them. So each get half the space of one large crate, & they spend 8 hours just wishing they could play with one another. When they’re finally let out, it’s just them playing by themselves. No one plays with them, & they’ve practically raised themselves.
This family member’s husband is also an undiagnosed psychopath, & has hosed the small pups for his own sick entertainment. I knew this bc I once went to fill their outside bowls with water from the hose, & when I picked up the hose they BOLTED-cowering behind chairs as I held the hose.
The neighbors, who used to get along with my family now all hate them bc the dogs are sometimes left outside alone for 2-3 hours & they bark & howl more than half the time. The cops have been called on multiple occasions for noise disturbances. My family member’s response has been “well it’s my house & dogs are just being dogs, so they can fuck off & deal with it”. She’d comply in the moment, but continued the next day & every day since the last attempt from neighbors. The two pups have also managed to escape MULTIPLE times (I don’t blame them) & again, I don’t know how they’ve survived thus far. I honestly wish one of the many people that kept bringing them back home would’ve just kept them. I’m sure the pups wished that too…
The family member (narcissist) also decided to travel more now, so she has one of her puppets (brainwashed friend who lives with her & HATES DOGS) begrudgingly “taking care” of them.. Just SO many bright ideas… smh
I wish I was making this all up, bc as I type, it almost feels unreal that these people are my family.. I decided many months ago that I would never visit that family member again bc I just couldn’t bare to see this reality.
She’s still upset that I convinced her son to re-home the golden retriever, & will often tell him she paid for that dog & he “should’ve never given him away bc he was happy & doing fine”. (He was actually extremely overweight, had fungus from lack of grooming, & was developing hip/joint issues)
Now, with his new family, he lost 20 lbs & is healthier/happier than ever.
I tried to convince the spoiled teen daughter (now in college) to help re-home these two poor pups, but she refuses to get involved.
After months of suffering thinking about them & their situation, I decided I needed to just let them go for my own peace of mind. I don’t see this family often, maybe 2-3 times a year (holidays mostly) and I’m sure you can all see & understand why…I wish there was a “CPS” for dogs (DPS), because it’s like knowing a child is being abused, but not ever being able to save them. At least kids can speak up or grow up & eventually escape.. It kills me to think this will be their life for the next 10 years, & that no one in that family thinks of this or even cares.
I still think of those 2 puppies (who are now adults) every now & then, but I just wanted to post this as a form of processing my emotions & grief..
If you stuck around til the end, thanks for reading. & If you have a pup, please give them the happiest, best life they deserve. They are a gift to this world, even though many humans don’t deserve them..
I have a family member who’s a narcissist that loves to use being a doctor as an excuse for her entitlement. She buys people & things bc she cares a lot what others on the “outside” think of her. Yet her own family & “inner circle” are just puppets to her. If she can’t manipulate you, she cuts you out. So reasoning with her is simply never an option for me, or any family member.
She has a track record of buying puppies out of spontaneity, not training them, & then giving them away when she couldn’t handle them-complaining “they’re too crazy!” or “they won’t stop peeing & pooping everywhere!”
She bought her preteen daughter a puppy (let’s call him Fido) 8 years ago & I don’t know how he’s still alive. Her daughter grew up extremely spoiled & never once took care of him. Her father is the one who would feed him & take him out in a backyard thats about the size of a regular bathroom (idk, I’m bad with measurements). This 10 lb dog has also gotten into chocolate SO many times that I think he’s actually immune at this point. They just laugh every-time & it’s really a joke to them that he’s somehow still alive. Fido spends his days sleeping or barking at the door when the mailman comes by.
Her spoiled daughter then asked for a golden retriever, who lived with them for about 4 years before I thankfully convinced my cousin to re-home him, after seeing how miserable that poor dog was, & all the health/joint related issues he was developing.
Walking dogs? Just not a thing in that home.
About 2 years ago, she bought 2 new puppies (different litters & breeders). & Of course, she never trained either of them or socialized them. Much like the upbringing of her own children, she believes her only duty is to meet the basic needs (shelter, food, water, & clothing).
They are also 2 small 8 lb pups who have basically spent their lives confined to a crate & that small backyard. The crates don’t even have beds, blankets or toys, bc they destroy/eat everything from being locked up for up to 8hrs a day, every day. Since they were never housebroken or trained, they obviously pee/poop all over the house. So this family member really thought, instead of training dogs or giving them away, she just needs to keep them locked up.
The two pups get along, but since they’re both not neutered or trained, one dominates the other, & the family has had to intervene a couple times when fights got serious.
New bright idea: They decided to keep them both in the same crate, with a baby gate dividing them. So each get half the space of one large crate, & they spend 8 hours just wishing they could play with one another. When they’re finally let out, it’s just them playing by themselves. No one plays with them, & they’ve practically raised themselves.
This family member’s husband is also an undiagnosed psychopath, & has hosed the small pups for his own sick entertainment. I knew this bc I once went to fill their outside bowls with water from the hose, & when I picked up the hose they BOLTED-cowering behind chairs as I held the hose.
The neighbors, who used to get along with my family now all hate them bc the dogs are sometimes left outside alone for 2-3 hours & they bark & howl more than half the time. The cops have been called on multiple occasions for noise disturbances. My family member’s response has been “well it’s my house & dogs are just being dogs, so they can fuck off & deal with it”. She’d comply in the moment, but continued the next day & every day since the last attempt from neighbors. The two pups have also managed to escape MULTIPLE times (I don’t blame them) & again, I don’t know how they’ve survived thus far. I honestly wish one of the many people that kept bringing them back home would’ve just kept them. I’m sure the pups wished that too…
The family member (narcissist) also decided to travel more now, so she has one of her puppets (brainwashed friend who lives with her & HATES DOGS) begrudgingly “taking care” of them.. Just SO many bright ideas… smh
I wish I was making this all up, bc as I type, it almost feels unreal that these people are my family.. I decided many months ago that I would never visit that family member again bc I just couldn’t bare to see this reality.
She’s still upset that I convinced her son to re-home the golden retriever, & will often tell him she paid for that dog & he “should’ve never given him away bc he was happy & doing fine”. (He was actually extremely overweight, had fungus from lack of grooming, & was developing hip/joint issues)
Now, with his new family, he lost 20 lbs & is healthier/happier than ever.
I tried to convince the spoiled teen daughter (now in college) to help re-home these two poor pups, but she refuses to get involved.
After months of suffering thinking about them & their situation, I decided I needed to just let them go for my own peace of mind. I don’t see this family often, maybe 2-3 times a year (holidays mostly) and I’m sure you can all see & understand why…I wish there was a “CPS” for dogs (DPS), because it’s like knowing a child is being abused, but not ever being able to save them. At least kids can speak up or grow up & eventually escape.. It kills me to think this will be their life for the next 10 years, & that no one in that family thinks of this or even cares.
I still think of those 2 puppies (who are now adults) every now & then, but I just wanted to post this as a form of processing my emotions & grief..
If you stuck around til the end, thanks for reading. & If you have a pup, please give them the happiest, best life they deserve. They are a gift to this world, even though many humans don’t deserve them..