Pregnant and wanting a puppy?

[lochie]

I have had Shepherds my whole life. The longest time I've not owned one was 6 months between buying and moving into my first home. In October, we went from a 3 dog house hold, to just 2. My sweet German Shepherd passed, and it has been heartbreaking enough, pregnancy hormones aside. My other 2 dogs aren't Shepherds, nor are they as attentive or affectionate as my GSD was. It's a very difficult and strange adjustment, to say the least. I love my other 2, but it just feels different. (For reference, the other dogs are ages 6 and 11 - totally independent and easy to care for.) I'm on the fence about adopting a GSD or getting a GSD puppy.
With all that being said, I'm due with my first child in March. Would I be out of my mind to even consider a puppy at this point in time? My partner is completely on board with the idea of getting another Shepherd. However, I don't want to make a snap decision, clouded by grief. I remember how difficult puppyhood is, and I don't know if it's wise to combine that with being a first-time mom. I don't want to end up resenting a puppy when my partner and I are trying to navigate parenthood.

Tl;dr: I'm 6 months pregnant, and my dog died. Is getting a puppy right now a good or bad idea?

 

[dgan]

@lochie Respectfully, you would indeed be out of your mind. I'm a mom too and I could not imagine having a puppy and a newborn, I think I would've completely lost my shit. I was barely functioning for the first month, couldn't even take care of myself, let alone a puppy.

Puppies need a lot of attention and a lot of training/care which will definitely be pushed aside once you're very pregnant and especially once you have a newborn. I think you will end up with a poorly behaved dog, or even having to rehome it.

My daughter is almost 4 and in preschool part-time and I'm still struggling raising this puppy and trying to give them both the love and attention they need and deserve.

ETA: I lost my first dog in August 2022 and I understand the heartbreaking grief. It was truly the worst time of my life and it still kills me. When she died, I went a bit crazy searching for dogs her breed. I realized I was trying to "get her back" in a weird grief-stricken way, and I am so happy I didn't get a puppy then.

We got our new puppy a few weeks ago and I cried a LOT the day we got her, I still felt guilt after this long. I will also say... a couple months after my girl passed, we rescued a stray kitten. She really helped bring me a tiny bit of joy but I didn't feel guilt because she was a cat lol so obviously I wasn't "replacing" my girl.

 

[lochie]

@dgan I truly am just blissfully unaware, as this is our first child. This is why I came to reddit. Part of me was thinking "Oh I can take the puppy out in the night when the baby wakes to feed, it'll be fine!" But I think it's exactly what you said towards the end of your response. It's my way of trying to bring back my best friend through justifying it one way or another. It's not even FULLY that I want a puppy because I do know how hard they are. My GSD was the youngest of the 3 and I vividly remember the terror he could be before around the 1.5 year mark (I say that with so much love intended, trust me.) I put a lot of time and effort into making him the gentleman he was but it was a lot of obedience classes, homework, and socialization. All of which probably won't work well with a brand new baby...

 

[jsigler]

@lochie Yes to add to all this - humans are born a bit too soon but if we were born later our heads would be too big and it wouldn’t work out. So the first three months is called 4th trimester because this human is absolutely entirely dependent on you and you won’t feel remotely human again for at least that long, and if you have struggles with your hormones it could be longer… be patient with yourself, focus on your sweet new baby and the rest will come in good time.

 

[lochie]

@jsigler Thank you for your kind words! It feels nice to hear that reassurance that there will be another and better time for a puppy to come into our lives.

 

[bella7]

@lochie The first three months of newborn life are like insane. I remember those three months barely lol i was in a state of not talking to anyone except hubby and mom. Barely looked at my phone. Spent the three months basically eating to keep breastfeeding going and cuddling baby. It was such a rewarding time but now that I have a puppy for the first time I would say please wait. W have now a 1.5yr old toddler and puppyhood is hard but I cannot even imagine handling it with a baby under 1

 

[davidandgoliath00]

@lochie I had a one year old dog when my daughter (now 2) was born. DON'T GET A PUPPY. Not only will you have a newborn, but you will also be physically recovering from birth or surgery. It's highly unlikely you will have the physical, emotional, or mental bandwidth for properly training and socializing a puppy while also acclimatizing to caring for a newborn. Having a one year old dog (that we got when he was 8 weeks and had been training constantly) was already too young of a dog. We all survived, but I do not recommend it at all.

 

[dgan]

@lochie For sure. I honestly was so unprepared for the newborn stage. I thought I was prepared, but sleep deprivation is truly horrible and really messes with your brain and body. It would be very easy to do something like forget the puppy outside all night, because you're just so fucking tired.

 

[imagebeastmarkbeast]

@dgan Omg sleep deprivation. I literally fell asleep on my feet leaning against the shopping cart/trolly while spouse was looking at pastries. My 2nd was sooner than we'd originally planned because hubby got mumps and that sometimes causes sterility, so we went ahead and had another right away. And he's addicted to animals so we also had 2 kittens and a golden Retriever puppy.

 

[dgan]

@imagebeastmarkbeast Omg! That sounds horrible

 

[imagebeastmarkbeast]

@dgan I really was ok, I'm not a germaphobe so toddlers sharing their food with puppies and wiping their faces on cats never bothered me. It was just a big messy baby pile. With a double load of laundry a day lol. Simmers were great, fed the kids on the lawn in diapers and hose everyone off after. They loved it. Wouldn't work today, but 35 years ago life was a little more casual.

 

[cosmic321]

@lochie I got my 4mo puppy when my daughter was 6mo old. It was a wonderful decision and as long as you know what you're doing, I couldn't suggest it more

 

[tniles408]

@lochie Currently pregnant with my first child and have a dog that will be 18 months when baby comes, I am already panicking about my SO going back to work and having to juggle the baby and the dog and she is the easiest going dog I’ve known.

I would wait sometime and settle into motherhood OP.

 

[valtan1]

@lochie I would say wait. You’d effectively be raising two babies at once, except one has sharp teeth and doesn’t wear diapers.

 

[lochie]

@valtan1 Two very valid points. Even if I got a brand new pup today, they'd only be 6 months old by the time the baby came.

 

[imagebeastmarkbeast]

@lochie Just in time for puppy adolescence lol. I’ve got 3 kids and have always had a multi dog house. I’d sincerely recommend either adopting an adult through a breed rescue that temperament tests or just waiting til you find your groove as a baby included household. I acquired a puppy when my second child was 5 months old, by then I felt like I knew he was sleeping and I was adjusted. Babies and puppies can happen well together, do not recommend doing either for the first time concurrently.

 

[lochie]

@imagebeastmarkbeast I feel like I could totally wait that long before considering introducing a pup into the home, especially after all the moms in the comments trying to bring me to my senses.

 

[imagebeastmarkbeast]

@lochie Having had puppies and babies together, I think it’s easier if you can figure out baby then add puppy. Sleep when you can a bit more that way lol

 

[lochie]

@imagebeastmarkbeast Completely understandable. Especially with this being my first baby. I'm clueless Thank you for your wisdom !

 

[vellaswin]

@lochie Search in this subreddit for “puppy remorse”. You love the breed, and if you don’t feel that you’re giving it your all, you’ll feel pretty bad. Wait til your child is older. It will be so much fun then.