JUST ANSWER THE QUESTION

[nigheandonn]

holy heckin’ bob I have to rant abt this (& it’s not always applicable to this group bc I have been in in LOTS of groups for pup owners and recently dipped out of a lot for the rant reasons)

I’m on here to say SORRY NO ONE CARES ABT UR NON ANSWER OPINION/UNSOLICITED ADVICE. seriously. NO ONE. holy heck.

oh someone asked about a better solution to keeping a dog from picking at stitches than a cone?? “WeLl YoU sHoULdN’t SpAy YoUr DoG tHaT yOuN-“ DID THEY ASK???

oh hey have tips on two puppies who pull on the leash? “WeLl AcTuaLLy HaVe YoU hEaRd AbOuT LiTtErMaTe SyNdRoM-“ YES! THEY HAVE and Im sure they have known about it. For a long time. Probably bc of their own research and the 200 comments preceding yours that are also abt littermate syndrome.

hey what’s a good adult brand kibble for my dog? “WeLl AcTUaLLy iF yOu DoNt FeEd YoUr DoG rAw ThEy WiLL LiTeRaLLy ExPLoDe!!” KAY THANKS! IS SOMEONE GOING TO RECOMMEND A KIBBLE BRAND??

I get it. We all get it. You think you’re a much better dog owner than anyone else. Congrats!! you win at making literally everyone pissed off.

Online. Offline. Most ppl who ask a question just want an answer to their freaking question. AND they’re looking for help to BE THE BEST DOG OWNER THAT THEY CAN BE!! If you’re all abt raw food join a raw fed group. I’m sure those members would LOVE to chat abt that w you. If you are super passionate about littermate syndrome....GO BECOME A DOG TRAINER!!! If you have a bunch of feelings abt when to spay a dog, go to vet school and actually learn enough to advise on that topic, OR just let someone else’s vet advise them! Etc.....et. freaking c....

I’m so tired of seeing, overhearing, and getting all the “you’re a terrible dog owner” pretend advice. For real, like get a hobby.

PPL ASK FOR HELP BC THEY WANT TO HELP THEIR DOGS DONT MAKE THEM FEEL WORSE FOR DOING SO!

 

[chrisw5977]

@nigheandonn For the most part, I think I agree with you. There's a lot of unsolicited advice out there and I think there's a lot of human ego driving people to share everything they know so they can pat themselves on the back. But I think there's an argument to be made for offering extra information too. I have seen posts asking about two puppies where one of the replies mentioned littermate syndrome and that was the first time the person had heard it. I understand that it gets really old over time, but sometimes as the replier, I think I would rather risk being a little annoying than risk not conveying some really important information that the person may or may not have. There are also times when it's absolutely appropriate to not answer the question, like when people ask "how can I dominate my dog?" or similar things that show a critical lack of understanding.

There's definitely a balance to strike and unfortunately I think we'll always live in a world where most people haven't found that balance. :/

 

[fallenangel12]

@chrisw5977

I have seen posts asking about two puppies where one of the replies mentioned littermate syndrome and that was the first time the person had heard it.

Can confirm, at one point I was the post asking theoretical question about two puppies. It was the first time littermate syndrom was brought to my attention and I am happy for it.

 

[nigheandonn]

@chrisw5977 I absolutely agree with balance! It also brings to mind the “read the room” phrase. If multiple people have brought up littermate syndrome, raw diets, fixing-ages, etc.... why do you (not you personally, but like anyone) feel the need to do that too for 3rd through 29th time?If it relates to the topic, go ahead and offer the advice in a way that’s respectful and not condescending. Other than that if it’s 1. Not related to the question 2. Already been offered .... then there’s no need to answer and you can read the post and move on.

 

[chrisw5977]

@nigheandonn Yeah I'm always kind of amazed at how little people read in general? I made a post today saying "I'm looking for advice, I'm already doing A, B, and C" and I got multiple replies saying "you can try A" or "have you done B?" and I'm like "...yes."

 

[unicornwarrior]

@chrisw5977 100%. Read the post if you’re going to bother to answer!

My posts are usually way too long and detailed but that’s because I’m looking for solutions that I haven’t already tried.

Or when I know a common answer to a question like...my dog pees in her crate, why could this be?...I already know that she’s not supposed to have a bunch of extra free room in there (and that’s a common solution) so I include that in my post and people still ask me if she has too much room in her crate and tell me that’s why she’s peeing in it.

 

[nigheandonn]

@chrisw5977 Yes! That absolutely grinds my gears especially when it’s suggesting something I’ve already done or just coming out of no where and offering some advice that I didn’t ask for! I can understand off topic, good faith suggestions, but when some just take it beyond being helpful and that’s so frustrating

 

[fallenangel12]

@chrisw5977 And it's not just dog groups. I remember I was asking purely technical question about a game on an advice subreddit. Post for whatever reason gained quite a bit of traction so I got a lot of responses and I kid you not, probably 90% of them stopped reading at title and said something to the effect of "yeah, buy, it's amazing". Dude, I was asking if it runs ok on my platform, that implies I already assume I'll like it.

 

[bdself]

@chrisw5977 It's almost like some people are sooo eager to show that they're the best dog owners that they quickly skim the question and then spew as much "knowledge" as they can.

It's also about the way they write it.

 

[htb33rod]

@nigheandonn Totally feel you. There are a lot of dog owners in our building, we being the owners of a 12-week-old pup get all sorts of unsolicited advice.

A lot of people seem surprised I keep the pup on his leash when socializing (It's because we are not socializing during a potty break you just wandered over uninvited with your 50lb skittish demon hound thing, but cool, thanks.) Then I have to remind them that I am waiting for a vaccines etc and its still like "oh mines fine though, its good for your puppy." and then they proceed to squeaky talk and rough house my dog into Tasmanian devil levels of over stimulation.

 

[tashatasha]

@htb33rod There’s a house I purposefully avoid on walks because the person who lives there would try to rough house with my dog, when I was trying to teach her NOT to play rough with people.

And god, the unsolicited advice. A neighbor told me I should smack her when she picks something up she shouldn’t have. No thanks! Keep your bad advice to yourself please.

 

[imagebeastmarkbeast]

@nigheandonn Mam this is a Wendy’s

 

[lovemarie]

@imagebeastmarkbeast I always chuckle when I hear this phrase, because I imagine an over-worked minimum wage paid worker having to calm down an obviously better off person than them, and just sigh like "Lady, you don't know what real problems look like"

 

[holysmoke]

@nigheandonn Yeah... We rescued our pup when she was 6 weeks old because she was already separated from her litter/mother. Yet every time I mentioned her biting it was "well you shouldn't have gotten her so young". Like... No one had a choice about that - would have loved to have left her longer, but I mean cuddling with corpses doesn't really do it for them either now does it? Let me just reverse time so I can rescue the whole family before I even knew it was an issue. That's the real solution here thank you so much for enlightening me!

 

[stevens86]

@holysmoke This was pretty much my experience. I tend to stay away from here now as the majority of answers I did get were basically useless and had nothing to do with the reality of the situation. The more posts I read, the more I suspect the vast majority of people who give out such shitty advice have never had an actual puppy and/or have no personal experience working through the problem they supposedly have the most generic "matter of fact" answer to.

 

[holysmoke]

@stevens86 That sucks, I'm sorry. I've had some good experiences here too though! You know your pup best, and I'm sure you're doing a great job for them. Wishing you a lovely adult doggo in the near future!

 

[soccer2222]

@nigheandonn Oh god, the raw food comments kill me. Not everyone has the time/money/fridge/freeze space to keep raw food. I hate the raw food movement for that specific reason - it’s like overbearing vegans and raw feeders are the same species!

And for what it’s worth, I tried my dog on raw food and he hated it. Honestly, some dog owners just give the shittiest responses when asking for advice!

 

[jessicaaddslove]

@soccer2222 Omg. Just while we're on the topic, I want to vent- there was a thread this morning in a vegan group I'm in for my city. I'm not vegan, but I eat a lot of vegan food often. The thread was asking about best vegan food brands for their dog, and all the comments were hating on everyone observing that's not healthy for dogs. Like... I'm sorry but dogs aren't meant to live on spinach and legumes, in the wild wolves are mostly carnivores! I have such a pet peeve with vegans forcing that on their pets! If you don't want to feed your dog both meat and vegetables, or meat to your cat, then get a rabbit.

 

[lovemarie]

@jessicaaddslove Dogs are not obligate carnivores like cats though. Dogs, like humans, are omnivores.

 

[ashfur]

@jessicaaddslove So just as a clarification, domestic dogs are not obligate carnivores - similar to humans (and bears lol) they are omnivores. This just means that they can also receive nutrients from plant sources as long as the nutrients are of the correct magnitude. That being said, if the posts you're seeing are for home-made feeding instead of a high-quality vegan kibble recommendations.. eek. But honestly, I would say that about any home-made diet, as it doesn't guarantee the properly nutrients are being provided.

I'm not saying dogs SHOULD be fed a vegan diet (similar to how I don't think they SHOULD be fed a raw diet), just that its perfectly possible to have a healthy vegan dog if they are eating the proper high-quality kibble.

Cats on the other hand.. I see so many vegans in groups looking for vegan cat food and that makes me sad. Cats ARE obligate carnivores unlike dogs, so not feeding them meat does in fact have serious health repercussions including potential blindness (from an Amino Acid deficiency that is exclusively found in meat products) and digestive tract problems (their digestive system is made to break down only meat and often struggles with vegan kibble).