Don’t know what to do about my (?) reactive dog. I’m so over it

[michael3817]

ETA: I’m not going to put her down. I should have used my words better, I’m just overwhelmed and stressed. Thanks for all of your feedback but the main thing is I don’t really want to keep her. I was never going to and do not have the capacity. I do love her but this isn’t feasible. I’ve found some FB groups that do private re homing and will try those (and vet all potential owners).

About 8 months ago someone on my local FB page asked if someone could take their dog in for a week as they had moved into a flat, the landlord was threatening eviction, and a new owner they’d found couldn’t take her for about a week. Well, it’s been 8 months and she’s still with me. Coco is a 2 year old Doberman/staff cross and is literally the sweetest, snuggliest dog at home but once she’s out of the house she becomes a strong snarling beast whenever a dog/cat/horse/bird comes into the picture. I’m at my wits end. I’ve tried the local dog’s trust to rehome her but they say they can’t help me because she’s too reactive. Any other rescue I’ve tried to get support from can’t help either. I have 3 other small dogs in my house and she gets along well with them but it’s too much. In the time we’ve had her we’ve insured her, had her spayed, changed her microchip info and taken her to the vet for regular checkups and vaccinations. I do love the sweet side of her but she’s such a menace outside. I pay 3x weekly (sometimes more) to take her to private enclosed dog parks as it’s the only way I can handle her. My husband can take her on walks as she’s super ball focused but I don’t feel comfortable (and he’s useless - another story for another day).

What can I do? She’s technically mine but I was only doing someone a favour. I’m almost at the point where I’m thinking of putting her down because this situation is consuming me. I also have 4 kids so overwhelmed is an understatement. I’m in the UK if that makes any difference.

 

[bea_lovesjesus]

@michael3817 No advice sorry, just... That really sucks. I'm sorry you're having to deal with someone else's mess.

 

[loreec]

@michael3817 I'm British too and I can tell you a UK vet is not going to have a dog put to sleep because they're difficult on the lead. Contact Woodgreen Animal sanctuary. They have a free behaviorist advice line that anyone can ring even if your dog isn't a Woodgreen dog.
I recommend Stop Walking Your Dog which has loads of ideas and games to do with your dog tu enrich their lives if they have no walk days or only short but successful walks.
8 months, although I'm sure it seems long to you, is a relatively short time for a rehomed dog to feel secure. It sounds like you've got an amazing bond at home where she feels safe.
It's so hard an exhausting and isolating bit keep talking and Woodgreen are incredible. Just having the behaviourist on call was a godsend to me.
Their website has loads of great resources.

I'm on my second Reactive staffie cross so don't hesitate to Dm x

 

[loreec]

The helpline https://woodgreen.org.uk/book-an-appointment/

 

[michael3817]

@loreec Thank you so much

 

[loreec]

@michael3817 No worries! I've been there. Ive only had my girl two and a half months and some days I'm so tired and down. Staffies are gorgeous but they can also be stubborn little buggers! my girl Lady is a staffie lurcher so she's like a staffie + on stilts and very strong on the lead when she wants to be and it's quire hairy if you're smaller
.

 

[blanksora]

@michael3817 Sounds like you never willingly made the choice to take her on. If she's only reactive but has no bite history, i would rehome her privately. It is totally legit that you cannot take on the large undertaking since you already have dogs and kids.

 

[monk58]

@michael3817 Have you had her assessed about the underlying emotion cause of her reactivity?

Is it frustration? She wants to say hi to the other dogs or chase the birds with prey drive etc. Basically arousal and excitment driven

Is it fear? Making a show to send other dogs or thing away?

There is lots of training and it is broadly similar for both types.

It is very straightforward to train on the leash reactivity like this but it does take time and focus

There would not in my country be any chance of a vet agreeing to put down a dog you describe as sweet and snuggly and with no significant issues ie can get on well with your dogs and family. No resource guarding etc

It wouldn't be thought of. We don't put dogs down for being a pain on a leash or outside the house

Reactivity is trainable and manageable.

We can give lots of help and resources here to start you on your journey on teaching her calm and alternative behaviours. I have a at one point very similar dog and have made good progress using my trainers techniques and managing his walks

I would suggest you look for a good positive force free trainer in your are. Even two or three sessions and the resources we will give you could help to make the walks much calmer. Even if it is your husband doing the walking for now

If you ahve a garden you and the children could concentrate on enrichment, play in the garden and training calm in the garden (most trainingbasics and foundation skills are done in a low distraction environment anyway first)

This could build your confidence and using mental puzzle games, scent work and obedience type drills in short burst.. say ten minutes or 15 minutes a couple of times a day actually tire a dog more than walking

A flirt pole and ball games int he garden if you have one and a scent hunt will help your dog be less frustrated

Followed up with a good stuffed frozen kong

Teaching the dog calm and to entertain itself

I do sympathise

There a re lots of resources we can offer to help calm this dog down

 

[michael3817]

@monk58 Thank you!!!! I will look into all of that!
I’m not really going to put her down I was just venting out of frustration

 

[monk58]

@michael3817 Thank you for not being upset with my post! I know well that feeling of venting.. just needing to and being distressed and baffled by what is going on

I reached my trainer and it was amazing.. just one session she got it and frankly gave me so much better confidence.. never mind the dog.. me!

I will put together a set of links that are the best I have found like my trainer taught me

It will take a little while but will get them to you soon

I so hope we can help your pup and you and your family even a little!

 

[michael3817]

@monk58 You are very sweet, thanks for all of your help x

 

[joyathome]

@michael3817 Two books that you might like are Turning Fierce Dogs Friendly by Kellie Snider and When Pigs Fly by Jane Killion

I would start with Pigs Fly It's a training system that is geared towards dogs who make decisions on their own, so when you go through the exercises many of them are geared towards getting the dog to reorient back to you or default to a preconditioned behavior that you would prefer they display.

For example one of the exercises involves just opening your front door (dog on leash) and just standing there and waiting, giving the dog a treat for every person that walks by, you start as soon as the dog notices the person and eventually people, squirrels/birds, cars etc all become a cue for the dog to reorient back to you and then you can start with the next step which is telling the dog what you'd like him to do when he sees a person.

The other book is about using contingency routines to teach a dog that the world's not so scary and that friendly behaviors work just as well as reactive /aggressive behaviors to keep him safe.

 

[michael3817]

@joyathome Thank you x

 

[lyndsmar]

@joyathome These sound great, I'm going to download them right now, thank you!

 

[thedwarf]

@michael3817 I'm not sure if you've looked already but breed specific rescues could be of help. I know you said she's a cross but a Doberman rescue may have a list of people who they could match her to?

 

[michael3817]

@thedwarf Good shout, I’ll have a look!

 

[jg76]

@michael3817 I feel like you've done so much for the dog in a situation where most people would not have put in half as much effort. So I want to thank you and say I appreciate people like you.

 

[michael3817]

@jg76 Thank you! It wasn’t by choice but that doesn’t mean I’m going to treat her any different than the dogs I have at home

 

[leonica]

@michael3817 Feel your angst...and applaud all you have done for her. I also commend her (and you) for getting along with your dogs, and your kids, there are truly worse situations where the dog cant be trusted even in the house with other dogs. This is a great quality, and seems the outside reactive thing is just her doing 'her job' another good quality but not fine tuned. I like the suggestions others have had here, the books I will read myself. Also, in the states I dont know of any private paid dog parks but Ive dreamed of them! As I also have dog 'selective-reactive' dogs and never ever take a dog to a dog park, but a private one...brilliant. Good luck!

 

[michael3817]

@leonica They cost £15/hour but I take all 4 dogs for a good run around, they absolutely love it!