faithnlove
New member
( Feel encouraged to comment with any ways that your reactive and/or aggressive dog brings joy to your life…..you know…..when they’re not increasing your heart rate . Idk about y’all but I thrive on wholesome/hopeful content like this.)
Having a high-anxiety/leash-and-barrier-reactive dog has made me hyper aware of things like triggers and thresholds. I notice many things about dogs, in general, that I’d never noticed before. I’m always on the lookout for patterns in my dog’s behavior that might be a red flag or a sign of stress. It can really feel like a tough weight to carry. I’d be lying if I said I didn’t sometimes wish for a break.
Even so…I’ve also realized that there are so many things about my pup that I am grateful for — both in spite of his reactivity, and because of it.
~Sure, he probably looks scary to a surprise passerby on their bicycle (assuming I didn’t see them coming in time to use management techniques). ~Yes, I’ve come back from walks just as on edge as him, many times in tears, overwhelmed by feelings of frustration and even failure. ~And yeah, if we see another animal outside — gawd forbid one that’s running — he screams like a drowning banshee and just might tumble off the curb in an attempt to lunge toward them
~~But you know what?~~
-He listens so well when he’s not panicking (honestly SAME, so who am I to judge?). He is super smart and excited to learn/follow commands. He catches on SO FAST!
—He visibly responds to positive feedback and it melts my heart. I often find myself dumbfounded at just how fucking SMART and GOOD he is whether prompted or not.
—If I drop food on the floor, 9 times out of 10 he won’t touch it unless I give him a cue.
—If I tell him to “stay” while tossing treats around the room, he will absolutely not move until he’s released. I’ve admittedly forgotten once or twice (FELT SO BAD), and only remembered after a few minutes…when I saw him sitting in the same spot I left him, watching me like a hawk.
—If his toy rolls underneath a table or tangles with a stray phone cord, or if the cat is in the way, he VERY CAREFULLY assesses the situation instead of diving right in to retreive it. You can see the gears turning in his head while he tries to nuzzle the toy out safely. If he can’t do so without disturbing the roadbloack, then he’ll turn to me for help.
-There are few things more pure than a happy dog chasing a ball. My heart flutters every time I see him playing and emanating joy.
—Same goes for his snuffle mats (i.e. his “blankies”). When he drags it across the house and drops it in front of me, usually letting out a dramatic HUFF in the process, basically saying “PLEASE MAMA GIBB TREATOS NOW”….it’s like a pure shot of serotonin. Straight to the dome. How could I ever say no?
-He is unbelievably gentle with every cat that’s come through our home (I fostered several litters of kittens last year). I’ve seen him process and adjust very carefully around tiny kittens. I swear to gawd he’s done a doggy version of tiptoeing through them, before
(I still feel bad for the feral cats outside, because they’ll never know he’s anything other than a loud beast. Outdoor animals just aren’t the same as indoor animals, in his eyes )
-He doesn’t resource guard. I didn’t know I was grateful for this until connecting with other reactive/aggressive dog parents, and seeing just how common and serious it is. My heart goes out to folks managing that with their pups, and I don’t hold judgement or criticism toward y’all! I just recognize that we’re fortunate to not add that struggle to our list.
—He has no issue with us taking things out of his mouth (playfully; otherwise he responds to “drop it”) or inspecting his teeth.
-Being a socially-anxious introvert, myself, I actually kinda like that he deters strangers from approaching us outside
—If any creepers consider coming at me, I’m certain he’d scare them off long before they act on it.
—As a female in a dense city, I feel 100% safe while alone at home with him. Willing to bet most people on this block have seen me walking/working with this strong-boii (APBT x Amstaff x Boxer x Etc.)…and I doubt anyone ever feels the urge to enter our home without permission LOL
__________________________________
This is a semi-regular reminder to myself to appreciate my non-human companions at every opportunity ❤ We’re really not that different in a lot of ways (especially as a neurodivergent human with an anxiety disorder).
Each animal is a complex individual. They come with a wide range of intelligence, experience, and emotions. There will always be parts of them that make life better, while other parts present challenges. What’s best for one won’t be best or another. All we can do is our very best, as their guardians, to love them and provide good quality of life (whatever that looks like to them).
Thanks for reading my mega-brain-dump. I hope you’ll feel like sharing the silly, sweet, lovable parts of your otherwise difficult doggos in the comments
(Edited bc formatting issues)
Having a high-anxiety/leash-and-barrier-reactive dog has made me hyper aware of things like triggers and thresholds. I notice many things about dogs, in general, that I’d never noticed before. I’m always on the lookout for patterns in my dog’s behavior that might be a red flag or a sign of stress. It can really feel like a tough weight to carry. I’d be lying if I said I didn’t sometimes wish for a break.
Even so…I’ve also realized that there are so many things about my pup that I am grateful for — both in spite of his reactivity, and because of it.
~Sure, he probably looks scary to a surprise passerby on their bicycle (assuming I didn’t see them coming in time to use management techniques). ~Yes, I’ve come back from walks just as on edge as him, many times in tears, overwhelmed by feelings of frustration and even failure. ~And yeah, if we see another animal outside — gawd forbid one that’s running — he screams like a drowning banshee and just might tumble off the curb in an attempt to lunge toward them
~~But you know what?~~
-He listens so well when he’s not panicking (honestly SAME, so who am I to judge?). He is super smart and excited to learn/follow commands. He catches on SO FAST!
—He visibly responds to positive feedback and it melts my heart. I often find myself dumbfounded at just how fucking SMART and GOOD he is whether prompted or not.
—If I drop food on the floor, 9 times out of 10 he won’t touch it unless I give him a cue.
—If I tell him to “stay” while tossing treats around the room, he will absolutely not move until he’s released. I’ve admittedly forgotten once or twice (FELT SO BAD), and only remembered after a few minutes…when I saw him sitting in the same spot I left him, watching me like a hawk.
—If his toy rolls underneath a table or tangles with a stray phone cord, or if the cat is in the way, he VERY CAREFULLY assesses the situation instead of diving right in to retreive it. You can see the gears turning in his head while he tries to nuzzle the toy out safely. If he can’t do so without disturbing the roadbloack, then he’ll turn to me for help.
-There are few things more pure than a happy dog chasing a ball. My heart flutters every time I see him playing and emanating joy.
—Same goes for his snuffle mats (i.e. his “blankies”). When he drags it across the house and drops it in front of me, usually letting out a dramatic HUFF in the process, basically saying “PLEASE MAMA GIBB TREATOS NOW”….it’s like a pure shot of serotonin. Straight to the dome. How could I ever say no?
-He is unbelievably gentle with every cat that’s come through our home (I fostered several litters of kittens last year). I’ve seen him process and adjust very carefully around tiny kittens. I swear to gawd he’s done a doggy version of tiptoeing through them, before
(I still feel bad for the feral cats outside, because they’ll never know he’s anything other than a loud beast. Outdoor animals just aren’t the same as indoor animals, in his eyes )
-He doesn’t resource guard. I didn’t know I was grateful for this until connecting with other reactive/aggressive dog parents, and seeing just how common and serious it is. My heart goes out to folks managing that with their pups, and I don’t hold judgement or criticism toward y’all! I just recognize that we’re fortunate to not add that struggle to our list.
—He has no issue with us taking things out of his mouth (playfully; otherwise he responds to “drop it”) or inspecting his teeth.
-Being a socially-anxious introvert, myself, I actually kinda like that he deters strangers from approaching us outside
—If any creepers consider coming at me, I’m certain he’d scare them off long before they act on it.
—As a female in a dense city, I feel 100% safe while alone at home with him. Willing to bet most people on this block have seen me walking/working with this strong-boii (APBT x Amstaff x Boxer x Etc.)…and I doubt anyone ever feels the urge to enter our home without permission LOL
__________________________________
This is a semi-regular reminder to myself to appreciate my non-human companions at every opportunity ❤ We’re really not that different in a lot of ways (especially as a neurodivergent human with an anxiety disorder).
Each animal is a complex individual. They come with a wide range of intelligence, experience, and emotions. There will always be parts of them that make life better, while other parts present challenges. What’s best for one won’t be best or another. All we can do is our very best, as their guardians, to love them and provide good quality of life (whatever that looks like to them).
Thanks for reading my mega-brain-dump. I hope you’ll feel like sharing the silly, sweet, lovable parts of your otherwise difficult doggos in the comments
(Edited bc formatting issues)