Should I bring my other dog when I put my dog with cancer down?

[oldaussie]

We recently found out our almost 9 year old beagle mix, Turk, has terminal cancer. He has been rapidly declining for the last 2.5 months and we finally figured out why. He’s hurting, a shadow of who he used to be so we’ve decided this weekend to let him cross the rainbow bridge.
My husband and I cannot decide if we should bring our other dog to see him after he passes. I’ve read that it helps them come to terms with their death but no real research to back this up. Our other dog, Tiberius, is almost 7 years old and adores Turk. Turk is all he’s ever known and definitely very attached. He’s also a sensitive dog, you can read his feelings when he’s anxious or sad.
We’re afraid it’ll make him even more depressed by bringing him or by not showing him the body we’ll be doing him an injustice for closure.

Edit I put in comments: Thank you all so much for the advice and support I finally found someone near us that does at home euthanasia, Turk will cross the rainbow bridge Monday. When we got him in college we always told him we’d get him a yard. He moved with us so many times, traveled states, went to the beach, and hiked mountains with his 3 best friends (us and Tiberius haha) He finally got the yard he deserved last year, I’m so happy we kept our promise and he gets to be at home.

Also thank you for sharing your personal stories, it has helped me come to terms with our situation a little bit. I can feel the love for all the fur babies I’m sorry you all had to experience the same thing we are.

 

[marilee]

@oldaussie Is there any way you can get the vet do carry out the procedure at home? My gut instinct is that all of you would be slightly more at ease having it take place somewhere familiar with happy memories etc. just my 2c

 

[pamelalove]

@marilee I agree with this! My little lady crossed the rainbow bridge last summer. I had promised myself when I got her that I would make her exiting this world as comfortable and non-scary as possible. She let us know it was time when she stopped eating and drinking. I found a home euthanasia vet. I had my pup in her bed, next to the fireplace. My dad held our pitbull (he wanted to know what was happening), while my mom, brother, and I surrounded her bed. She was first given a sedative to relax her. My brother held her paw, I held her little head while looking in her eyes, and my mom petted her back. It was hard but I held her little head in my hands, petting her softly, and saying I loved her over and over again. I watched as the life drained from her eyes. She wasn’t scared. She was calm because I believe she understood she was loved and it was okay to pass on. I miss her dearly but I wouldn’t have done it any other way for my best friend. I owed it to her after she spent a lifetime comforting me.

 

[deaconpete]

@pamelalove I used home euthanasia for my girl when it was time. It was much easier on her than going to the vet but it was a lot more expensive. If you can afford it it’s definitely worth it

 

[james238]

@pamelalove That’s what I did for my girl, I still cry thinking about it but having them come to the house was the best choice

 

[swinswin]

@marilee It's way easier for everybody involved. And the dog is comfortable for his last moments instead of sitting at a vet

 

[hillegas]

@marilee My vet came to my house to put my childhood dog down. It was so nice to do it there

 

[qu30]

@marilee Agreed. I did this with my cat.
I think it is also a good idea cuz u don’t want the surviving dog to associate the vet’s office with the death of his friend. That might make future vet visits more difficult for him

 

[pandalarry]

@oldaussie Yes so the other dog can say goodbye and so you can both be there to support the dog who is being put down: hold their paw and talk to them until the last moment. And take your dog for a walk afterwards as it will be lonely and sad to go home, and very very hard

I am sorry for what you are going through life isn’t fair and F**** cancer

 

[oldaussie]

@pandalarry Thank you for the advice. Totally f*** cancer, I work with cancer patients I can’t imagine how my pup feels

 

[pandalarry]

@oldaussie He’s probably tired and sore and probably feeling cranky somedays,
Tell him it’s not his fault and sometimes cancer just happens,

Your other dog needs closure and he knows something is wrong, he will have anxiety if you just bring the one dog and return crying and sad without the other dog, dogs do need to know what is going on too: definitely include your other dog in everything: the funeral etc he will understand and he will comfort you too

There is a YouTube channel “mo mountain mutts” or “Alaska dog bus” your dogs might like watching It: dogs get picked up on a school bus and go for off leash walks in the mountains and some dogs wait outside by themselves it is cute to watch, (I remember when we first left our dog home alone we would play YouTube videos of dog competitions or dog training and our dog would sometimes teach himself new tricks so dogs do like tv sometimes too)

 

[holyghostfire777]

@oldaussie Check if there is an in-home hospice vet in your area!! When my dog died, we had a vet come to our home and do the euthanasia in our living room so he wouldn't be scared, we could hold him, and the whole family could be there including the other dog.

It was the saddest and sweetest thing ever! After he was gone, I set him down for her to come sniff him and she totally brought him one of her favorite balls and put it by his head!

 

[caminator]

@holyghostfire777 Omg bringing the ball...my heart would shatter into a thousand pieces

 

[holyghostfire777]

@caminator Yeah, I absolutely lost it! And we buried him with the ball she brought him. It seemed right.

On a side note to OP and others, I absolutely believe her being there helped with her grief. He was almost 15 when he passed and she was 9 and had only known life with him around. We always joked that they were like an old married couple that bickered sometimes but really loved each other, they were such good buddies. She was definitely depressed for a while after he died but she didn't go through that phase of looking for him that you hear some dogs go through when their companion is taken away and just never returns.

Plus it was absolutely 1000x more peaceful for him, too. He would have been so stressed out at the vet! Instead I got to hold him in his own home where he lived his entire life. Sad, heartbreaking, but beautiful.

I cannot recommend it enough for all pet owners! In-home euthanasia is the way to go!!

 

[zolak]

@holyghostfire777 Seconded. Did this a few years ago and it was a beautiful way to let my other dog be there for her pal. Highly recommend.

 

[billg]

@pandalarry i’m crying thanks

 

[kjp4au]

@pandalarry God our dogs are only 4 & 1 and reading this made me cry

 

[kck]

@kjp4au My puppy is only 4 months old and today I saw a video on Instagram that said “the puppy you bring home in your 20s is going to break your heart in your 30s” and now I’m sobbing in bed because one day she will leave me

 

[gbhar]

@oldaussie I had Lap of Love come to my house which I highly recommend. Had my other dog in the other room while it happened, but after my sick dog passed I brought my other dog out to sniff him. She didn’t really react but the vets say it’s important for them to understand.

 

[asparien]

@gbhar Lap of love is wonderful