Adopt or Not?

[badasin22]

What would you do? We’ve been fostering a super sweet 6-year-old beagle, and we may be able to adopt her soon. But, we’re honestly struggling if we should.

I have two young kids (2 and 4)…so they’re loud and still learning how to respect personal space and use gentle hands. Our foster is not aggressive at all, but isn’t used to living with kids, so she spends a lot of her time hiding upstairs away from the kids. We’ve had her for about a month and she is slowly opening up a little bit more and hangs out with all of us from time to time—usually at bedtime; she will snuggle with them when they’re settled in on the couch or in bed. She’s very attached to me and will try to hang out with me, but if the kids are loud (which is often, because #kids ) she runs to hide upstairs.

Our previous dog was also a rescue, so I do know they take time to come out of their shell and settle in. Part of us feels like we may not get a better dog for this current season of life we’re in, but part of us feels that she may do better with a quieter older couple. The shelter says she seems very happy and not stressed, and I plan on talking with them when she does become available for adoption, but what would you do?

 

[123456christian]

@badasin22 I probably wouldn't. It doesn't sound like she is really comfortable with the level of activity in the house, and that isn't something that is really going to settle down anytime soon. She would likely be happier in a home without young kids or maybe even no kids and just less activity.

She might not be super stressed, but she is avoiding the activity with the kids. That she can get away is good, but it could become an issue if she is ever in a position where she couldn't get away.

It really sounds like she would do better in a home where she can thrive and not have to hide when she is uncomfortable.

 

[elaineb97]

@badasin22 She is not the dog for your family. That's ok! None of you did anything wrong. You just aren't right for each other.

Foster a different dog with a different temperment. You need a laid back dog that doesn't care and isn't bothered by much.

 

[8erkid]

@badasin22 Don’t forget about the 3:3:3 rule!
3 days to decompress from the environment that they were in to your home, 3 weeks to learn the daily routine of the household (you’re about here with your foster beagle!), and then 3 months to feel that they are “home”. 1 month is an awfully short time for a dog to get used to their environment and it might be that she isn’t being set up for success quite yet since it’s been only a month. Slow introductions for limited time each day with new things (2-5 minutes to start) with slowly increasing intervals, along with absolutely giving her the space she needs to be by herself (upstairs like you mentioned). Some anti-anxiety meds for short term use might help her (pheromones plug ins around the house are awesome!). Plus the perfect time to teach the little ones how to respect dog behaviour and cues, as long as you are always supervising.