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@cglil I have this one client who literally said to me once, "You're the only person she's afraid of!"..........while holding her 35 pound dog like a human baby and kissing and whispering to him. Every drop off with her is a 10 minute ordeal of kissing and whispering while I stand there and make...

@mari79 I hate it when my coworkers make me stand up for them against their customers, but then immediately cave like a spineless coward when dealing directly with these same clients. Then they complain about how behind they are!! Like come on dude I don't wanna hear it, you just made me look...

@itsthatislandgirl I mean...no one is forcing them to come in every two weeks. If they want to save money, they can come in less often. Unless you're struggling to fill your books, why would you offer to do something for a reduced price if you can easily fill the same appointment slot with...

@xekuter we have a client who managed to make their puppy hugely obese by 8 months old. Not even exaggerating, this dog legit looked like a table (back so flat and wide you could put a cup on it) with tiny legs AT 8 MONTHS. It's fatter now. They got this one after they lost their prior, hugely...

@cicion I can't freaking stand lagottos and their owners! They both are always mega high hit-their-head-on-the-moon anxious. And they always bring you those stupid packets of instructions...one woman brings me (every time) like 20 pages worth of info and full color photos full of bullshit fake...

@jay2242 Sometimes it's just reflex, too. Most dogs do good, so it's kind of a go-to line that gets said on accident when I'm busy or distracted or hungry.

@chaz1268 and whatever the hell is going on with the rotting food in their matted beards.

@eurombrem one time I was trying to shave spiderweb mats off a dog's sanitary with a regular 10 blade. The dog was really heavy and leaning on me and my blade angle was weird...it made a cut just like this. This groomer was REALLY hacking into this dog and not looking.

@junior2708 I've got a client who signed an actual contract with her breeder that said she couldn't get the dog shaved because it would change the coat. I didn't even know what to say to her...because the only thing going on in my head was "your breeder is either so god damn stupid or a massive...